Sunday, September 25, 2011

The Curse of Social Media - Bullying and Idiotic Remarks

            Everyone who knows me, can emphatically state that technology is a passion.  New gadgets, gizmos, the latest craze - when it's announced, I will be reading about it or trying it out. 
            When social media pages were developed, the concept of sharing information online did not appeal to me.  We have so many problems in our society with stalkers, pedophiles, murderers and other deviants that the idea to post personal information was taboo, in my perspective.
            My daughter urged me to try MySpace because she wanted a page as well.  I agreed, as long as I had her username and password to check on her account periodically.  (I'm sure that's another argument in the future, but she's not your daughter  <grin>)
            Through several trials, we both gleaned that MySpace was a bit annoying with all the ads and the actual page format and we ceased using it.  Then, along came Facebook.  Now, this was one I truly enjoyed.  The presentation on the computer screen was clean, friendly and not so many of those annoying ads.
            Facebook became a device for contacting long, lost friends, distant relations and making connections with others that shared the same perspective on life values.
            Sounds wonderful, correct?
            Unfortunately, it's now become a place where people can vent their anger by cursing out their neighbor, hurling insults at an employer, slandering exes and intimidating the meek and mild.
            When did people lose their brains? 
            No one enjoys being humiliated in public.  Do people not understand that just because you're typing it, doesn't mean you aren't still embarrassing someone?
            I don't want to read about how you hate someone or who was "mugging" you at a game.  Facebook is not a sounding board to air your dirty laundry. 
            In order to be an adult, you deal with conflict personally and privately.  You don't state someone's name on the web and hurl expletives at this person.  Mostly everyone who reads your comment has no clue what just happened.  It makes YOU look ignorant and leaves a bad taste in the mouths of your readers.
            Some will argue, "But I'm just venting steam!"  Fine, but you don't need to state someone's name, the place, time or incident.  The fact is, you are committing something called "cyber bullying" or "defamation of character."  In the heat of emotion, you are not thinking clearly.  Its advisable to step back and regain control of your feelings before you begin announcing it to the world.  You may also regret your comments the next day and damage a bond with someone, not to mention staining your own reputation as well.
            You can be mad at your friend or boyfriend or girlfriend or co-worker, but face the reality that we are all human and make mistakes. We upset people but we must learn from it.  If the error is so erroneous that you can never forgive this person, then MOVE ON!  Don't keep it alive by posting it all over the internet for the entire universe.  You are allowing this person to control you, because you can't let it go.  You are giving permission to others to make comments and the wound will never heal.
            Ive seen people post, I dont need your comments, but…”  Hello?  Facebook is all about stating opinions.  If you do not want others to reply, DONT POST IT.  You dont have the right to become angry.  It was your doing when you opened that door.
            We all get upset.  We have our moments and feel we have been wronged horribly.  Usually, the other person is feeling the same way but from a different perspective.  If you truly must purge your soul, find a close friend that can listen, comfort and allow you to express yourself.  Don't post your hate filled rants, because in the long run, it will back fire and may haunt you in the future.

1 comment:

  1. Agree 100%. I have family members that love the drama they stir up on FB. It's embarrassing to the rest of us.

    As for bullying, I'd bet money it's been around since the cavemen, but social media just gives it a bigger audience. It's time for people to speak out against those who bully, whether in person or online.